Wednesday, September 03, 2014

Surrendering, whats that all about?

Wow I am a terrible blogger, its been 3 months since I have posted here.  It isn't that I have forgotten, honestly I have thought about it many times, its just that I never quite know what to say, or that anything I have to say is that interesting.  I haven't painted as much as I should have either. But what I have done is I quit smoking (YAY!) I am still using e-cigs, but no more cigarettes, tar, smoke and the 4000+ chemicals that go into cigarettes now a days.  I bought my last pack of smokes on July 5th.  I also quit drinking soda for the most part and have been drinking mostly water.  I have had a couple cream sodas this week but its mainly been water.  So I am making some positive changes.

I also am trying to change the dynamic of my painting classes.  I am offering classes at home and at a local coffee shop and well we will see  how that works out.  I have laid it all at the feet of Jesus and I refuse to worry over it.  Certainly could use some prayers over all that..  :)

So I suppose my topic should be surrendering to Jesus (I never know what I am going to blog about until I have typed a paragraph or two!) This has always been a topic that confuses me somewhat.  We are told that we need to surrender it all to Jesus, our problems, worries, etc.. That we need to die to ourselves ... but what does that all mean? How do I just lay the problems at Jesus feet, surrender to him my daily worries and still make the daily decisions and such that need making?  Am I taking control by making decisions, I know it does not mean I should just check out and couch potato it all while Jesus handles it all.

So I pray and I ask Jesus to take it all and do what he will with it basically.  Take my painting classes Lord, take my finances, take my living situation.  And I am trusting that eventually unless I panic and grab control again, He'll bring me through and improve my situation. I suppose that the ability to surrender is also your ability to trust in Him.

 In the meantime, I teach every class I can, I work through the mire and paint when I get the inspiration and motivation (they don't always come at the same time.. and that's another topic for another day!). And everyday I learn how to surrender it all. Again.

This weekend I did do some painting, one painting I liked a lot, and one, not so much.
Winter Creek
12" x 6" Pastel
This one I liked :)
Jersey Shore Sunrise
6" x 6" pastel
This one, not so much ... I loved the reference, I just don't feel I successfully captured the amazing beauty of it.  But that's just me, my own worst critic.

Matthew 16:24-27
Then Jesus told his disciples, “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will find it. For what will it profit a man if he gains the whole world and forfeits his soul? Or what shall a man give in return for his soul? For the Son of Man is going to come with his angels in the glory of his Father, and then he will repay each person according to what he has done.

Proverbs 3:5-6
Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths.