Friday, May 09, 2014

The struggle to know Gods will

I know it has been a while since I have posted.  I have thought of it but always its too late, I'm too tired or some distraction presents itself. The last couple of months have been a bit of a struggle spiritually, as well as financially as I wrestle with what I am supposed to be doing.  Particularly with the painting classes I am offering to local resorts.  I knew it would start off slow but it has stayed slow and it is discouraging.... even though i know it isn't fair to judge it till summer.

I have always struggled with my purpose here.  I have always felt it was to be an artist and I continue to feel that way.  But although that's what I feel my purpose is, is that God's purpose for me?  How do you discern the will of God? If it was God's will would it be such a struggle? Or is the struggle God's will for me?

All I can do is continue on til He smacks me upside the head eventually with the answer.  In the meantime, since I have posted last there have been some ups and downs, I did not get into the Art Market Gallery but I had 3 paintings accepted into the Biscuit Festival's juried show. Although I have not had a painting class to teach in 3 weeks, I sold 2 paintings in 2 days this week! I also found out this week that the Wyndham Resorts classes fell through because of company policies (I am not quite sure what policies they are but there is so much red tape in that company its a wonder they get anything done). That was quite a disappointment as it is one of the largest resorts around.  The roller coaster  of my life.

One project I worked on since my last post was a painting I donated to my church.  One of the themes we have been following at church is that if you want to walk on water you need to get out of the boat.  There was a special offering last week and although I don't have much extra money to offer, I can offer a painting.
If you want to walk on water...
Oil on canvas
20" x 24"
Private Collection

I enjoyed painting it and although people are not my strong suit, it came out OK I think.. I prayed a lot over it and I know it is flawed, as am I. I think perhaps I need to step out of the boat myself..... and then maybe I will learn God's will for me. 

Romans 12:2
Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.


Chris Lally said...

"For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11 You are a gifted painter. Don't give up.

Joni said...

Thank you Chris ;)