Tuesday, October 14, 2014

Stuck

Im stuck.. Im working on a painting and Im stuck.  I have a problem with confidence, I always feel like Im about to wreck the whole thing and this is a large painting. Im doing the painting for a silent auction to benefit The Friends of the Great Smoky Mountains.  It a really high end affair and has some high end artist that participate.  I am honored to have been asked and nervous about not measuring up. I'm about halfway done and I haven't been able to work on it for 3 days now.  I'm so clever at finding so many other things that must be done instead of buckling down and finishing this painting. Like reworking my website www.serendipityartist.com which is what I did today instead of painting (it did need it!).

It's fear that has control.

Fear that I will screw it up.

Fear that it wont measure up.

Fear that I am not able to do an amazing job on this.

Where fear is in control God is not so I know I must let it go and give it to God, to let God have control.  I have to let go of the ME ME ME, stop worrying what people will think and just do it.... Easier said then done sometimes.

Whats amazing to me is that I never plan what I am going to blog about, I just start typing and the answer to my problem just shows up! Well sometimes anyway, but this is one of those times I think. Tomorrow I will endeavor to finish this painting but before I start I will give it to God and seriously pray over it!

In other news, still waiting on a closing date for the house my sister is purchasing but hoping to be moving within the next two weeks.  This will be seriously helpful as I will have studio space.  Right now I am rather cramped with studio being in my bedroom. Things have fallen together concerning the purchase of this house that only God could have orchestrated it so well!

This will be my studio space although I have been told I can't have the whole room, it will still be plenty of space compared to what I have now! God is able has been a recent theme I have been seeing lately and I believe it!

Sunday, October 05, 2014

Ramblings

Brrrr 45 degrees out,  fall is here in full force today!  Seems like just yesterday it was 80 degrees ... ohhhh wait.. it was!

But anyway...

A few changes coming down the pike for me I hope.  In a couple weeks I will be moving (so long as God willing things work out) and I will actually have some studio space!  I may also start teaching at Michael's stores in the area, which should be fun.  Im trusting in Jesus that things will work out to his will.

So for quite some time now I have been trying to figure out how to use my art as a ministry or as a way to glorify God, it is something I struggle with.  I have been reading the Purpose Driven Life for the last month and it has been enlightening.  When I finish maybe I can articulate better what I have learned from it.  Finding out why I am here, what I am to do.. how to proceed, this is what I am searching for, and sometimes it just seems easier to do nothing.

Which is what I have been doing a lot of...

Although I did do this painting of a shelter cat, and pet portraits are something I would like to concentrate on in the next month.

Bird Watching
Pastel 5" x 7"

I will hopefully get back to you with some good news in the next week or so!